“I’m a woman, Mary, I can be as contrary as I choose.” – Violet Crawley, Dowager Countess of Grantham, to her granddaughter, Lady Mary Crawley, in Downton Abbey.
And I will add that there is never a time when a woman is more contrary, irrational or emotional as when pregnant.
We keep a thankfulness journal as a family, and at dinner we talk about something for which we are thankful and write it down. Last night, Greg said he was thankful that he is not the one who has to be pregnant. Here’s why.
Yesterday Greg helped me remove everything from our minivan (car seats, donation items, stroller, etc.) so I could go get it washed and vacuumed. I went to our usual place around 2 p.m. to find a crazy line. The big banner with hours listed said it was open until 6 p.m. I decided to go back around 5:15, at which time I found they had closed off the line and put up cones, not to mention covered up the closing hours on the sign. The pregnancy-induced rage that can rise so quickly to such a level boiled over and I got out of my car and began to move the cones. Someone came over to tell me they were closed. There’s no need to detail the rest of my discussion with the owner; all you need to know is that it reduced me to a heap of tears, as cars got stuck behind our van on a busy street, causing a ton of road rage and honking. I came home rather quickly, and Greg saw my face and asked why I was crying (because despite my drive home and sitting outside the house trying to stop the flow, there was no ending this cry quickly). I think I managed to blurt out, “They covered up the closing time on the banner and put up cones and then the owner had the balls to tell me they close at 4 and I just started crying and I can’t stop. I’m pregnant, that’s why I’m crying!”
I am fully aware that many women are capable of manipulating with tears to get what they want. I’ve heard several stories about women doing this to, say, get out of traffic tickets. However, this was not that. The pregnancy cry can come on at any time, over any little thing, and more often than not, you don’t WANT to be crying, and that just makes you cry more because you can’t stop.
It’s all part of the wonderful experience, I guess. It’s times like these when I’m so grateful Greg understands that there is no way to understand what I’m going through and he just offers support and love. He offered to vacuum out the car. He helped put everything back into it for me. And though it’s not clean, it’s raining today anyway, and would have just become an instant, muddy mess again. I’m thankful that he realizes he should be thankful not to have to be pregnant.
And as for crying, it eventually stopped. In fact, I think my tear ducts were empty, because Downton Abbey was super sad last night, and I didn’t even shed a tear.